Party at Sandra Lee's!

Open wide, New York State

Open wide, New York State

Congratulations and commiserations to the people of New York State, who now have this gibbering 70’s throwback as their common-law First Lady. At least the political news has a shot at being mildly amusing, in, say, the way laughing at a 39-year-old with a Scooby Doo birthday theme is mildly amusing.

Let’s check out one of the lady’s recipes, shall we? What about her infamous Kwanzaa Cake?

1 (10 to 12-ounce) purchased angel food cake
1 container (16 ounce) vanilla frosting
2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 (21-ounce) container apple filling or topping
1 (1.7-ounce) package corn nuts
1/2 cup pumpkin seeds, toasted
1/2 cup popped popcorn

Special Equipment:
Kwanzaa candles

Using a serrated knife, cut cake horizontally into 2 layers. Place bottom cake layer, cut side up, on a serving platter. Mix frosting, cocoa powder, vanilla, and cinnamon in large bowl until combined. Spread about 1/4 of the frosting over top of cake layer on platter. Top with second cake layer, cut side down. Spread remaining frosting evenly over top and sides of cake to coat completely. Spoon apple pie filling into hole in center of cake. Place candles atop cake. Sprinkle top of cake with some corn nuts, pumpkin seeds, and popcorn. Sprinkle remaining corn nuts and pumpkin seeds around base of cake.

And then, presumably, set it on fire and give heartfelt Kwanzaa thanks for the fact that nobody could expect you to put that in your mouth.

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10 thoughts on “Party at Sandra Lee's!

  1. Oh God Oh God Oh God. She’s here, she’s smiling, and she’s popping!

    Luckily for us in New York City, Albany is far, far away.

    How can she possibly maintain that figure of hers on a diet of canned dreck and cheap vodka?

    Like

  2. She’s a hot blonde who made a success out of her family’s failures but damn, girl … Kwanza is so totally anti-everything Americans hold dear you should be ashamed of yourself for toadying to whatever crowd of whackos you’re toadying to.

    This is so very very embarrassing. For her.

    Like

  3. I think the “emetic” tag is the best part of this. No one should stumble on Sandra Lee without warning.

    Having said that, her Christmas party episode featuring the cocktail tree is one of the most surreal cooking show episodes ever. It’s not Christmas without seeing it — like the Grinch.

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  4. Yes, the cocktail tree is on YouTube, which is where I got my first exposure to her. Thank god they won’t let you upload more than ten minutes at a time. Viewing more than ten consecutive minutes of this dizzy “blend a can of Grade A fruit cocktail with some cheap vodka” Barbie could lead to hallucinations, like the concept that her recipes are a good idea rather than low comedy.

    Like

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